Separation anxiety is exactly what it sounds like: Anxiety about separating. The level of this phenomenon has risen since the pandemic, and it is important to be aware of this. You might have struggled with these feelings since long before the lockdown, and if you feel that the last year has intensified the anxiety, learning how to manage it is extremely important. Whether it is the fear of separation from a child, a significant other, or any other kind of important relationship, it is important to learn to cope. In an article provided by PsychologyToday, F. Diane Barth L.C.S.W. illustrates ways to achieve this.
Be sure to prepare for separation. Be open and honest with yourself. It is okay if you are having contradictory feelings. If the people you are experiencing the anxiety from feel a different way than you do, make sure to listen and not feel defensive. It might be difficult, but it will help you feel more ready if you are honest with yourself and others.
Take it in small steps. If possible, give yourself some brief and tolerable moments of separation so that you can manage longer ones. With children or pets, the more often you reunite after a shorter break, the easier it’ll be to understand for them that you will come back after longer time periods.
Stay in touch with your loved ones. Even short check-ins can have a big impact. Reminding someone who you might know is experiencing separation anxiety that you love and care about them can go a long way. Even a short and simple text when they’re on your mind can help ease stress.
Get involved in new activities and meet new people. Distract yourself as though you are a small child. Enjoying activities and new people outside of your loved ones does not mean you’re forgetting them. You are just learning to balance new dynamics, and there is nothing wrong with that.
Have patience with yourself and others. Sadness or anxiety regarding separation does not go away overnight. It might take time, and there is nothing wrong with that. You eventually will be able to find balance, and it’s okay if it is gradual. Learn to be okay with the process, and make sure to give yourself or your loved ones as much time as needed.
Overall, one's capacity for attachment is as important as the ability to separate. Your body’s signals to be anxious over separation might indicate that you are deeply attached to a person, not that you are not independent enough. Verifying that your attachment is not toxic, and managing the sadness so it does not negatively impact your daily life is crucial. If separation anxiety is becoming debilitating for you, do not hesitate to seek professional help to assist you in finding your balance.