The current state of the world has thrown most individuals off of their typical routines and schedules. Not only does being in quarantine throw off your schedule, but it may even force a shift in the dynamics of your relationships. When couples are isolated together, it is normal for issues to arise. This does not mean you do not love your spouse, and it is important to recognize that you are not alone. Most people aren’t used to being in the same space as anyone constantly, so when your routine is completely thrown off and suddenly you are with your spouse 24/7, anxiety and stress naturally may rise.
Research has shown that a negative event within your relationship has about three times the impact of a comparable positive event, so in these troubling times, it is especially important to try to keep a positive mindset when possible. When you are in quarantine, it may seem difficult to come up with new things to discuss or look at to keep things light. Try to look at old photos of previous positive events and discuss the happy memories. If nostalgia is indulged in the right way, it can make you feel more satisfied with the present and more optimistic about the future.
It is hugely important to not strive to be a perfect partner, but to simply do your best to avoid making rudimentary mistakes. Try to be conscious of the promises you are making and remember that it is better to promise less and deliver than it is to promise the world and fall short. By keeping this in mind, arguments and unnecessary anxiety can be avoided.
Another key way to avoid tension within your relationship is by monitoring your own reaction to inconveniences. If you feel that your partner is being irrational, try to see their side and be calm when trying to resolve the issue. If you are frustrated with something your partner has done, think before you place blame. When you make a mistake, you may tend to blame it on temporary external factors. However, when your partner makes a mistake, it is common to wrongly blame it on their flaws. Instead of making this leap, try to give them the same benefit of the doubt that you may give yourself.
Alone time is still possible and should be utilized when you feel it is necessary. Just because you find yourself in the same house, isolated with your significant other, does not mean you need to spend every waking moment next to each other. If you are both working from home, try working in separate rooms when possible. Do your best to take time for yourself and do some activities you enjoy. Needing space does not mean you are a bad partner, it simply means that you are aware of your boundaries and what you need to better your own mental health, which will greatly benefit your relationship.
There is enough angst and fear going on in the world, so try your best to not bring that into your household. Looking at the bright side of the situation and being aware of the effect your words have are crucial during this time. Establish boundaries when you need to, and remember you are not alone. This is a period for growing, and you may even come out of this stronger than ever.